So events this week are forcing me to run through my Finally Watched list because we’re changing television providers…again. Long story. Point is I don’t have time to do anything other than write Finally Watched articles for the feature, so I’m going to break out another one of those.
Valerian And Laureline is a French sci-fi comic series about two ” spatio-temporal” agents having adventures. I have not read this comic, save for a Free Comic Book Day release to promote the movie and the English translation of the series to coincide with it. It seemed okay but for the most part I cannot tell you how accurate an adaptation the movie is to the comics. Said movie was not received well by the sci-fi movie loving community, but it’s one that’s been on the list since it came out, and I finally had the chance to watch it. Given that I disagreed with the consensus before, what are my thoughts this time around? Let’s see.
RELEASE DATE: 2017
RELEASED BY: STX Films in the US, with a bunch of different distributors based on what country it was released in
RUNTIME: 2 hr, 16 min
RATING: PG-13
VIEWING SOURCE FOR THIS REVIEW: SyFy
STARRING: Dane DeHaan & Care Delevingne
SCREENWRITERS: Luc Benson (also credited are the comic’s writer, Pierre Christin, and artist, Jean-Claude Mézières)
BOX OFFICE: $41,189,488 US & Canada and $225,973,340 worldwide gross, according to IMDB
ESTIMATED BUDGET: $177,200,000 (estimated) according to IMDB
The Plot: In an alternate 2020 a joint space station slowly led to, or at least was inspired by, world peace. As time went on, other planets joined, to where the station had to be launched into deep space. Agents Valerian and Laureline were sent to retrieve an animal that pours out pearls, and a large pearl that’s part of a classified attack on a planet thought dead. (The name of the people that lived on the planet was also Pearls, so don’t get them confused.) There’s a conspiracy going on, but a vision by one of the planet’s natives before her death reaches Valerian years later, and he and his partner may be the key to saving the galaxy.
Why did I want to see it?: I’m trying to remember. I know the trailer was interesting, but also when the movie came out there was a Free Comic Book Day preview that looked interesting. That’s all I’ve seen of the original comic so I won’t be able to really compare it as an adaptation, but the movie looked interesting. I probably wanted to take a look at a modern take on a classic science fiction work from another country that I hadn’t seen.
What did I think?: As a creator I have to praise the worldbuilding. The alien designs, the concepts of the aliens at the heart of the conspiracy (it’s not as built out as the Na’Vi and I’m already more interested in the Pearls than I am the Na’Vi) are interesting, the concept of Alpha (the former Earth space station that’s now the titular City Of A Thousand Planets in space) works and could be used very well. The effects are also really good, and it’s a shame to see more modern movies with larger budgets not measure up.
Unfortunately, that’s the majority of praise I have for this movie. The effects and worldbuilding do not make up for a story that is better on paper than in execution. Until the last act the movie is more worldbuilding than story. Part of this is the fact that the characters barely emote. I know that’s a choice because despite the critiques against DeHaan and Delevingne, there are times where they do some some range, albeit during the banter and when Valerian is possessed by the spirit of one of the aliens, plus when he played a shapeshifter disguised as Valerian. Otherwise only the Pearls, one of the thugs at the start of the story, and a sex club owner (long story and because I recorded this from SyFy late at night I ended up with more sex cams and phone sex ads than I wanted) really show any emotion until the shootout at the end.
Valerian and Laureline’s chemistry only shows during the banter. Their subplot is Valerian trying to get Laureline to marry him, and a supposed character arc where Valerian’s attitude is supposed to improve and finally win her over. The former just pops up to pop up, which is more than the latter arc does. Nothing really seems to change in Valerian’s attitude visually. The story tells us he’s better by the end, but I don’t see it in the events or performances. Points for how the military response to the conspiracy goes, but I won’t spoil more than I have to.
Was it worth the wait: Honestly, not really. It wasn’t terrible, but it was boring until the final act, but unlike MASH and The Legend Of The Lone Ranger, two movies I couldn’t get through even for a review, I was able to watch it. Having to stop to help my dad with something didn’t help, but it was a welcome distraction because outside of the opening scene that sets up the story and the final act was the only time I was invested, and only because the Pearls plot was the only thing about the movie I got into. It’s worth watching for the worldbuilding and visuals, but don’t expect the best presentation of either.
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