A little something different tonight. I heard about this during a discussion on the alt.toys.transformers newsgroup about the new G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra movie, and frankly it’s one of my new favorite songs. I love a good ballad, even if it is a parody of a show I seldom watched. Courtesy of Funny or Die and Cha-Ching Pictures, I bring you…The Ballad of G.I. Joe!

Check out the cast for this production:

Laz Alonso as Doc
Alexis Bledel as Lady Jaye (don’t tell Scarlett or Flint, but if Duke ain’t watching her, I am!)
Billy Crudup as Zartan
Zach Galifiankais as Snow Job
Tony Hale as Dr. Mindbender
Vinnie Jones as Destro
Joey Kern as Tomax
Joey Kern as Xamot
Chuck Liddell as Gung Ho
Julianne Moore as Scarlett
Henry Rollins as Duke
Alan Tudyk as Shipwreck
Olivia Wilde as The Baroness
Sgt. Slaughter as Himself <—That’s right, SGT. SLAUGHTER!
Also featuring Jamin Fite as Cobra Commander
Frankie Kang as Storm Shadow
Geoff Mann as Buzzer
Andreas Owald as Snake Eyes
Daniel Strange as Torch
Kevin Umbricht as Ripper

Also go to the Funny or Die page (where you can download the audio MP3) and check out everyone involved. The words and music alone put this on my “favorite songs period” list. Billy Crudup’s Zartan scene is my favorite, but what wouldn’t qualify? Sgt. Slaughter…SGT. SLAUGHTER, PEOPLE!…at the end. (That part just really makes the video with me.) Scarlett’s self-doubt. The ninjas on downtime. Tomax’s expression when he realizes what he’s doing. Cobra Commander boogieing down to Three Dog Night. (Who by the way still tour last I heard–I even caught their show a few years ago…they’ve still got it!) Mindbender unknowingly being ham radio buddies with Gung Ho. Destro and the Baroness practicing the clarinet! It’s just one hit after the other!

(Special bonus points for not going for the “gay” joke Shipwreck seems to get saddled with. I’m betting most sailors are straight! Jerks! Plus he was always the ones hitting on the ladies.)

The costumes are also spot-on, with a few hitches (Buzzer’s beard, the rather un-svelte ninjas, Destro looking like his head is painted rather than wearing a metal mask…which would have looked silly playing the clarinet, but fun silly). Crudup could so play Zartan in the movies. They’ve got everything, even down to Doc’s odd green-lensed glasses. (Not being a big Joe fan, I don’t know if there’s a story behind those.)

Truly a great job by everyone. I think I’m going to go listen to it again. And check out Alexis Bledel some more. Not exactly Lady Jaye’s personality, but too cute for me to care! I chalk the image up to Scarlet’s insecurities anyway. Wait, that’s the girl from Gilmore Girls? Boy has she grown up?

About ShadowWing Tronix

A would be comic writer looking to organize his living space as well as his thoughts. So I have a blog for each goal. :)

One response »

  1. […] actually filmed live-action segments for later “rerun” seasons of the original. He even appeared in a comedy video about the Joes and Cobras’ downtime activities. And it all started here. We’ll be […]


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